The Everyday Misadventures of Earth's Mightiest Heros
by Joki of Sassgard
Summary: What do The Avengers do when they aren't saving the world? This is a collection of short (well, some VERY short) one-shots I'm writing just for fun! Reviews and ideas would be appreciated. Rated T just to be safe. Updates every Friday! (I don't own the cover art, I just found it on the internet)
1. God bless America

Dressed in his Captain America suit, Steve was just returning from a mission when he sneezed.

Tony jumped up and saluted. "God bless America," he said.

Coulson did not approve.

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**(A/N.) Coulson does not approve of your shenanigans, Tony**


	2. Mashed Potatoes

**(A/N. Enjoy!) **

Clint Barton and Natasha Romanoff were eating lunch in the cafeteria. They were chatting about the near-death experiences they had had that week when a glob of mashed potatoes smacked the female assassin on the cheek.

Hawkeye burst out laughing as Black Widow whirled around to where the potatoes had come from. At the table next to them, the Science Bros where sitting, spoons in hand, mouths agape.

Tony pointed to Bruce and Bruce pointed to Tony.

"He did it!" they both said at the same time.


	3. Spiders

**(A/N. Shout-out to YukiGirl21** **the Black Widow/Spiderman idea!)**

* * *

"SPIDERMAN STINKS!" Jay Jonah Jameson's voice boomed from a TV screen over New York. "HE'S A MENACE!"

"Doesn't JJJ ever shut up?" Spiderman groaned slinging a backpack over his shoulder. He was on his way to the Helicarrier to talk with Nick Fury about joining a new project.

Spiderman swung onto the Helicarrier and found the director who was just wrapping up a meeting with some of the Avengers.

"What's up?" he asked everyone pulling an apple from his backpack. "I hope you don't mind me bringing food, I haven't eaten all day."

Hawkeye blew a bubble with his gum. "Who's the kid in the pajamas?" he asked.

"Hey!" Spiderman objected. "I made this myself!"

"Calm down Betsy Ross."

"This is Spiderman," Fury said before the young hero could respond. He bit into the apple, sulking. "He has joined our project to train new recruits."

"Spiderman, huh?" Tony said suddenly interested. Turning to the assassin, he said, "I think you have a fan Natasha. You two related?"

Natasha raised an eyebrow. "Ummm, no. He's not Russian. Why do you ask?"

"Oh come on! Black Widow, Spiderman, you two have the same theme. You should quite the Avengers and create your own spider team. I can see it now…. The Amazing Arachnids!"

Natasha face-palmed.

"Yeah, thanks but no thanks. Besides, I'm the spider around here."

The female assassin glanced at him curiously. "And what makes you say that?"

"Um, hello? I was bitten by a radio-active spider, I shoot webs, I climb walls, I have super-spider strength, spider sense, yada, yada, yada. What do you do?"

The room fell dead silent. Even Fury almost felt sorry for Spiderman as he munched on his apple.

In the blink of an eye, Natasha pulled out a gun and fired, the bullet passing through the center of Spiderman's apple. "That," she said putting her gun back into its holster, "is what I can do."

Black Widow stood up and walked out smiling smugly leaving behind a very stunned Spiderman.

Tony chuckled and muttered something.

"What was that?" Clint asked the billionaire.

"I ship it."


	4. Doctor Who

The Avengers were gathered in the theater room at Stark Tower.

"Do you have an adequate amount of popcorn, sir?" JARVIS asked Tony.

The billionaire glanced at Thor who was currently stuffing his mouth with fistfuls of popcorn and snorted.

"Yes, we do, thanks," Steve said before Tony could comment.

"I require more of the popped corn!" Thor announced, his mouth full.

"SHHH!" Natasha hissed. "The show's starting!"

Tony's cell-phone rang and everyone groaned. Tony fished it out of his pocket and jabbed the answer button angrily.

"You have reached the life model decoy-"

"Enough, Stark!" Loki's voice hissed. "Where are you insolent creatures? I am taking over Manhattan! Come and face me!"

"No way Loki, the new season of Doctor Who is on."

There was a shocked gasp on the other end of the line. "That was today…..? I'LL CALL YOU BACK!"

* * *

**(A/N:) Nothing interrupts Doctor Who ;)**


	5. Grilled Cheese

**(A/N. Enjoy! This is one of my favorites :) Please reveiw)**

"I AM A BILLIONAIRE, GENIUS, PLAYBOY, PHILANTHROPIST!"

Pepper dashed up the stairs at the sound of her boyfriend yelling in an angry voice. What in the world was going on this time?

"I AM AN AVENGER!"

At each shriek, Tony's voice was getting louder and more distraught.

"I AM IRON MAN."

Now Pepper could smell smoke. What was going on up there?

"I HACKED SHIELD!"

The chaos was coming from the kitchen. Pepper burst in to find Tony standing in front of the stove wearing her apron. Gripping a spatula firmly, the genius was yelling at a pan that contained a burnt mess of what used to be a grilled cheese.

"I SAVED THE WHOLE FREAKING WORLD, WHY CAN'T I MAKE A-"

"Tony!" Pepper interrupted his rant. "What are you doing?!"

He cleared his throat and adjusted his apron. "Everything is completely under control."

The fire alarm went off.

"Shut up, JARVIS!" Tony said waving the spatula around angrily.

Pepper raised an eyebrow. "You can't make a grilled cheese?"

Tony snorted. "I built an entirely functional suit of armor in a cave with chewing gum and paperclips, of course I can make something as simple as a-"

Pepper rolled her eyes and held out her hands for the spatula. Tony quickly obliged.

"Now, skedaddle and let me work in peace," Pepper said, scraping the charred mess from the pan so she could make a new sandwich.

Tony headed out of the room but turned around and asked. "Uh, you're not a feminist are you?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Just let the record show I didn't ask you to make me a sandwich."

**(A/N:) I know I've written a good bit with Tony, but he's so fun to write about! XD I still need your suggestions so be sure to leave them in the reviews. Thank for reading!**


	6. Wrong time of the month

**(A/N:) Here's the one-shot requested by JuTheAngel! Hope it's okay, it was really hard to write :P I actually had several different versions and just pick the one I hated the least.** **As always, reviews and suggestions are appreciated! **

Dr. Banner was tinkering around in one of Tony's many labs. This was one occasion where everything was strangely quiet as he worked, because the billionaire wasn't anywhere to be seen. Well…. At least for now.

Suddenly, Clint burst through the door and hid behind one of the desks.

Bruce raised an eyebrow. "Agent Barton?"

"HIDE ME!" the agent hissed. "She can't find me!"

"Who?"

Clint looked left then right, up and then down, as if searching for the person of interest. "Natasha."

The scientist snorted. "Romanoff? Why not?"

"I… uh… she…"

While Clint stuttered for words, the god of thunder knocked the door down with a bang.

"Aww, Thor…" Clint whined.

"A-ha!" Thor exclaimed. "The man with the eye of a hawk! I require you assistance."

"Not happening."

Thor ignored him and continued to talk. "It is Jane. She is acting very…. Peculiar."

Clint raised an eyebrow. "Like she's extra grouchy, moody, emotional, and touchy?"

Thor nodded eagerly. "Precisely!"

Groaning, Clint said, "Sorry Thor, but I think that she's-"

"What happened to the door?!" Tony said. "Never mind, you guys have to hide me! Pepper is-"

"Not Pepper too,"

Tony looked at Thor then back at Clint. "Are you serious?"

"Anthony Stark!" Pepper yelled from the doorway.

All the guys jumped and whirled around. At the sight of Pepper, Natasha, and Jane fuming in the doorway, Thor, Clint, and Tony all fought their way to hide behind the desk.

"What is the meaning of this?" Pepper said pointing to the shattered mess that used to be a door.

Tony peeked over the desk. "That had nothing to do with me, it was Break Point."

Jane huffed. "Figures. She glared at the demi-god. "All you ever do is wreck stuff!"

"Oh, you want to talk about wrecking stuff?" Natasha challenged, eyeing Clint who gulped.

Bruce was standing back at a safe distance, watching as the three Avengers slowly came from their hiding spots and instead hid behind him, thinking that they'd be safer with a Hulk shield.

"Dude, you have to help us," Clint begged. "Natasha is unbearable during her…. Uh…menstruation. I'd rather face another Chitauri invasion.

Bruce cracked up.

"Cut it out," Tony hissed. "You can't joke about this. Period."

Then all the guys cracked up despite the situation.

"We're going to get ice-cream." Jane informed them. "Thank you for paying, Tony."

"Wha-" Tony reached for his wallet only to find that it had vanished from his pocket and now in the hands of Natasha. She had somehow managed to pick-pocket him while they were laughing.

The girls left with satisfied smirks on their faces.

"Sir, I believe Miss Romanoff has stolen something," JARVIS said. "Would you like me to intervene?"

"NO!" they all shouted.

**(A/N:) Be sure to check out my latest story, "Family Ties" Thanks for reading **


	7. FANGIRLS

**(A/N:) Thanks for the reviews everyone! They make me so happy ^.^**

"Loki, what madness is this?!" Thor demanded as the two not-brothers stood before each other.

"Why does anyone do anything?" Loki scoffed. "Because I'm BORED."

Thor raised Mjolnir threateningly. "I will put an end to this!"

"You may try," Loki's hands began to glow with magic. The two demi-gods circled each other, ready at any moment to engage in an epic battle…

Then there was a high-pitched squeal. Out of nowhere, a teenage girl ran up wearing a shirt that said "Made To Be Ruled by Loki". She latched onto Loki's waist in a hug. Thor looked on befuddled.

The trickster steadied himself, arms outspread to keep his balance.

"What is the meaning of this?" Thor demanded.

Loki groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Fangirls."

Suddenly the ground began to shake and a low rumble could be heard. Thor steadied himself as glass shattered and sirens began to blare. Loki's usually impassive face was full of terror.

"ACK!" he hollered, trying to pry the girl of his waist but she clung to him like a vice. "Thor, you have to help me!" Loki panicked.

"Loki, what is going on-?" Thor was cut off when he spotted a horde of fangirls on the horizon.

Loki finally broke free from the fangirl and ran for his life. Thor laughed. "That is quite an army you have there, brother."

"SHUT UP, THOR."

**(A/N:) FANGIRLS. FANGIRLS EVERYWHERE.**


	8. Pillow Fight

It was a slow day on the Helicarrier. Rain was pouring down outside and a few agents were beginning to get a little restless…..

Natasha was reading a book when she heard Clint calling her from the next room. "Hey, Natasha!" The assassin tried to ignore him, but he was persistent. "Taaaashaaaa... Tasha, Tasha, Tasha! BLACK WIDOW!"

She finally gave up and stormed into the next room ready to destroy Clint for interrupting her reading. "WHAT IS IT-" but he was nowhere to be seen. "Clint?"

"Up here."

Natasha looked up. In the rafters, there was a pile of blankets and pillows with a small opening where Hawkeye's face was visible.

"What in the name of sanity are you doing?"

Hawkeye chuckled. "I built a nest."

Tasha face-palmed. "You've got to be kidding me."

"Hey!" a voice called from the other side of the room. There was another 'nest', and in this one, Falcon's face was visible.

"Sam?" Natasha raised an eyebrow.

"Don't diss the nest."

"She's just jealous because we have awesome forts," Clint called. "Birds of a feather, flock togeth-" he was cut off when a stray pillow smacked him in the face "HEY!"

Natasha smirked and gathered more discarded pillows, throwing these and Same who tried, unsuccessfully to defend his nest.

"THIS IS WAR!" Clint shouted.

* * *

Agent Coulson had been sent by Fury to inform Black Widow of her latest mission. He knew she'd be glad to get out and do something. Natasha wasn't in her room so Phil asked the nearest agent where she was. The agent just pointed to the next room, eyes slightly wide.

Coulson thanked him and entered the room…. only to get hit upside the head with a pillow.

"SURRENDER!" Clint yelled. "YOU ARE NO MATCH FOR US!"

"NEVER!" Natasha shouted back, viciously throwing pillows.

"I'VE BEED HIT!" Sam gasped.

Coulson quietly closed the door. Apparently, Black Widow was already involved in more pressing matters. He was going to go to back to his office, he did have loads of things to attend to…

The head agent stopped and went back into the room. This was ridiculous.

"Enough!" he called, stopping the onslaught of pillows. "This is wrong. Unforgivable." Coulson stared at each of them in turn, and they all dropped their heads. "You are agents of SHIELD for goodness sake, you ought to know that good pillow fight requires an even number of players."

Natasha, Sam, and Clint all grinned wildly as Coulson grabbed a pillow and aimed.

"This is more like it. Game on."

**(A/N:) Everyone who reviews gets to join the epic pillow fight! I don't know about you, but I'd want to be on team Natasha and Coulson ;) **


	9. Uno

**(A/N:) Thanks so much to all of you lovely people who have reviewed, favorited, and followed this story. It makes me so happy! ^.^ Hope you enjoy this next misadventure! **

* * *

"Peeeeeeeppppeeeeerrrrr," Tony moaned like a pitiful dying cat. "I'm sooooo boooorrreeeed."

"Tony I'm busy," Pepper groaned. "I can't entertain you right now."

"But what am I supposed to do?"

"Go play a card game or something."

The billionaire's eyes lit up. "A card game? Hmmmm….."

* * *

"Draw two," Steve told Natasha with an apologetic look. She huffed and grabbed two more cards. "You're turn , Thor."

Out of boredom, the Avengers had assembled to play Uno per Pepper's suggestion.

"UNO!" Thor yelled.

"No, no, no, Thor," Clint said. "You only say "uno" when you have one card left."

"Very well then, instead I shall put down the card of multiple colors, thus changing the primary color to the one of my choosing!" he announced.

Tony rolled his eyes. "And what is the color of your choosing?"

Thor thought for a moment. "Red!"

"Oh come on! That's the only color I don't have," Tony pouted grabbing a card out of the stack.

Bruce silently celebrated when Thor changed the color to red. He had one card left, a red six, and he would win on his next turn. All he had to do was wait for Clint…..

Clint stared at his cards for what felt like an eternity to Bruce as he fidgeted in his seat, ready to be the victor.

"Uno!" the archer said, laying down a draw four. "Boo-ya! Now I'm gonna win for sure! Draw four Bru-" Clint gulped. "…..Bruce?"

"HULK SMASH PUNY CARD GAME!"

* * *

Maria Hill ran up to the SHIELD director. "Sir, the Hulk is on a rampage!"

Fury whirled around, regarding Hill with his one good eye. "What's going on? Who called it in? Is there another invasion? A super villain attack?"

"Pepper Potts called it in. The Avengers were playing a card game."

"A card game?"

Hill nodded. "Uno."

Director Fury confiscated the Uno cards the next day.


	10. Bedazzled Eyepathes

**(A/N:) SURPRISE! Early update :D I wasn't going to update until next week but I found a trigger on Facebook that I couldn't resist writing early XD Hope you enjoy it!**

* * *

Silence. That was something extremely rare on the Helicarrier, but behind the locked doors of Nick Fury's office the director was enjoying the long over-due quiet. His job was very demanding. Especially when it came to 'babysitting' the Avengers. Specifically Tony.

But now, Fury was on break, leaving Coulson to handle any dilemmas. And Tony.

He stretched out in the chair, feet propped up on his desk and closed his eyes…..

_Some time later..._

Fury jumped up with a start. He had taken an unexpected cat-nap. But what woke him? Shaking his head to clear the fogginess of interrupted sleep, the SHIELD director checked his watch.

Uh-oh.

His break was long over and on top of that, he had a meeting with the Council in two minutes. Jumping up, Fury unlocked the door and rushed down the hall. A few random agents stopped and stared and him. A few where snickering but they would shut up when he shot them a glare. Had they never been late for something?

"Director Fury!" someone called behind him. Fury turned around and saw Coulson walking up behind him, but the head agent stopped in his tracks, eyebrows raised.

"Well?" Fury prompted angrily. Between being late, disrespectful agents, and interrupted sleep, he was not in a good mood.

"Uh…. The Council is waiting for you…."

"Like I don't know that," Fury huffed, turning and walking away.

"Umm, sir…?"

"Coulson, I don't have time for this!" Fury called over his shoulder. "Save it for later."

The director walked into a secure room and sealed the doors as the screens came from the ceiling, each one projecting the image of one member of the Council. He was opening his mouth to address them when he was interrupted.

"What is the meaning of this?" a board member demanded angrily.

"Excuse me?"

Another member had begun to laugh quietly behind her hand. "Have you looked in a mirror?"

"Wha-?" Fury bolted for the nearest reflective surface, jaw dropping at his reflection. No wonder all the other agents were staring.

The center of the director's eyepatch was decorated with sequins and red glitter that shimmered in the light. Looking closer, Nick realized the sequins were arranged to say, "Stark Rules."

Fury put a hand over his eyepatch and murmured that he'd be back later.

* * *

"You wanted to see me?" Natasha asked walking into Fury's office.

"Yes. I have a job for you." Fury answered. He had swapped out eyepatches for one that wasn't glitter covered. "How familiar are you with Stark Tower?

* * *

Tony headed down to one of his many labs to work on his latest suit of armor. He was particularly proud of this one. It was just so…. Tony-ish. The philanthropist hit a few buttons causing a panel in the wall to slid open revealing the suit.

Tony yelped.

His new suit was covered from helmet to boot in sparkly pink glitter-glue.

* * *

"You're back already?" Fury said when Natasha reported in.

Black Widow shrugged. "I had practice."

"Practice?" Fury looked at her dubiously.

Nodding, Natasha explained. "I was hired by Tony earlier today to 'bedazzle' your eyepatch."

Natasha bolted down the corridors, grinning and Fury's angry shouts behind her.

* * *

**(A/N:) As always, reviews are greatly appreciated! **


	11. On your left

**(A/N:) Hey everyone! Thanks so much for all the follows and reviews. I'm going to do my best to update every Friday. If I ever go over two week without updating you have my permission to spam my PM o3o. Now, on with story!**

* * *

It was wonderful weather in Washington DC today. The sun was shining, a faint breeze was blowing, and-

"On your left."

"Oh, come on!" Sam protested as Steve passed him yet again. "Don't be a show-off!"

But Steve was already out of earshot. Sam pouted to himself.

* * *

_The next morning..._

Clouds whizzed by as Falcon soared through the sky, enjoying the adrenaline rush he always experienced in the thrill of flight. Sam dove, zigzagged around birds, flew in corkscrews.

He could do this all day.

Sam took a deep breath and smiled to himself. He had ditched his usual morning routine of running and decided instead to take to the sky. Now he didn't have to worry about-

"On your left."

Sam jumped slightly. "What the-!?"

Captain America whizzed by, riding Indian-style on Iron Man's back. Tony waved an armored hand as they passed Falcon, a smirk was on his face, but no one could see it because of the helmet.

Mouth agape, Falcon just stared.

* * *

_The next morning..._

Sulking, Sam decided to stick to running today. Who knew? Maybe Cap would be a no-show.

The sky was overcast, threatening at any moment to pour down rain as Sam began jogging. Once he warmed up, he switched to running, moving his arms and legs until they burned. Still no sign of Steve yet…

Then Sam heard him approaching. He had grown quite accustomed to that sound. "Yeah, yeah, I know," Sam panted. "On my-"

"On your right."

That was unexpected. Sam looked just in time to see someone whizzed by, but it wasn't Cap. This fellow had his dark hair pulled back in a pony tail. And a metal arm.

"Barns?!" Sam skidded to a stop. Bucky waved over his shoulder.

"On your left." Steve said running past Sam.

"And then there were two." Sam huffed. "Great. Just great."

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**(A/N:) Anyways... review please? I love hearing from you guys! :D **


	12. Coffee

**(A/N:) *throws confetti* OMIGOSH! Over 50 reviews!? O_O You are all fantastic! Thank you so, so, so, so much :D**** Enjoy!  
**

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In a little coffee shop at the corner of the street was where Natasha and Clint decided to unwind and recover from their latest mission.

"What can I get you?" The man behind the counter asked. Clint noticed his nametag said "Steve."

"Coffee. Black." Natasha ordered.

"Just give me anything with caffeine," Clint asked rubbing his eyes. He was exhausted. Steve nodded and went to fix the beverages.

Hawkeye stretched and yawned. "All things considered, I think things went well," he said to Black Widow. He grinned. "It was like Rio all over again."

"You and I remember Rio very differently," Natasha answered.

"Here you go," Steve said, returned with the drinks a few minutes later.

"Oh, thank you," Clint said, fishing for his wallet.

"Freshly brewed," Steve added.

"Okaaay," Clint handed him the money and Natasha took the drinks, but Steve wasn't done talking yet.

"By the Lok-alizer."

Natasha studied the odd man with a mustache. "Um… thanks," she said as she and Clint turned to leave. "That guy isn't the brightest crayon in the box," Natasha whispered.

"I couldn't survive without that stuff," Steve called, seemingly unaware of the fact that his customers were leaving.

Clint turned around and saluted him with his coffee. "Yep. It's the gas in my engine."

Steve chuckled. "I totally know what you mean," he said as Clint took a drink. "But… uh… the funny thing about that cup is… uh…"

Natasha raised an eyebrow.

"There's no gas in the engine." Steve finished.

Clint spit out the coffee. Wiping his mouth, he said, "What are you talking about?!"

Steve smirked, a wicked gleam in his eyes. "Well, there's no caffeine in it!" Steve burst out laughing. "It's a decafe! I took the caffeine… out! I decaff'd it. Decaffeinato. Decaffeine-ited."

"Okay, we're leaving now," Natasha announced, grabbing Clint and pulling him towards the door. That dude was absolutely bonkers.

"You're going to be soooo sleepy later!" Steve yelled. He was jumping up and down, cackling to himself. "Decafe – and you needed caffeine! HAHAHAHAHA! It was a prank!"

Natasha yanked the door open.

"You've been LOKI'D!" Steve yelled.

Natasha froze and slowly turned around to see that Loki was now standing were "Steve" once was. The trickster was twirling an invisible mustache. "Ooh hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo!" Loki laughed. And with one final shout of "LOKI'D!" he disappeared in a swirl of green smoke.

Clint stared at were Loki disappeared, then at the cup of coffee in his hand, then at Natasha. He threw his coffee in the trash. "What," he asked, bewildered. "was _that_?!"

* * *

**(A/N:) I still need ideas! If you have a funny trigger in mind, I'd love to hear it. You can leave it in the reviews or PM me. Please keep in mind, however, that I will not do anything M rated. This story is only rated T just to be safe. But seriously though, I need some inspiration if I'm going to continue updating every Friday. Have a great week! =^)**


	13. Movies

**(A/N:) *fist pump* Yes! I made it :D **

** Enjoy the next misadventure!  
**

* * *

Pedestrians in New York looked up as the once clear, sunny sky that was growing darker by the second. They murmured to one another as thunder rolled in the distance, rapidly approaching. The murmurs turned into surprised yelps as a torrent of rain unleashed from the sky, drenching everything in seconds. People ran for cover as lightning struck, watching the sky, terrified, as dark clouds swirled directly above Stark Tower…

* * *

_"Long live the King," Scar whispered menacingly before letting Mufasa drop into the wild stampede below._

_"No!" Simba yelled._

"NOOOOOOOO!" Thor bellowed, making Steve jump and cover his ears. Thor, who had been sitting next to the supersoldier on the couch watching "The Lion King" fell on his knees in front of the TV, yelling in anguish.

"HOW COULD HE DO THAT?" Thor was on the verge of weeping. "HOW COULD HE DO THAT TO HIS OWN BROTHER?!"

Steve warily patted the distraught god on the back. "It's okay, Thor, it's not real," he assured.

Rain was pouring outside, lightning flashing everywhere. Steve had to get Thor calmed down before he drowned New York.

"I do not understand," Thor stared blankly at the screen. Simba was in the process of telling his dad to 'wake up,' which made Thor howl again.

Pepper and Tony ran into the room. "What the heck?!" Tony said. "What's going on in here?"

"Uh, Thor got a little upset when Scar betrayed Mufasa…" Steve tried to explain.

Tony groaned as Pepper graciously stopped the movie.

Kneeling down in front of the thunderer, Pepper patted his shoulder. "There, there, Thor," she said, smiling sweetly. "It's just a movie. Would some ice-cream cheer you up?"

At the mention of food, Thor's demeanor immediately changed and the onslaught of rain outside diminished. "I should like that very much, Lady Pepper."

"Great! I'll go get some now, come with me."

Thor left with Pepper, Tony shaking his head as he watched them leave. "Whose idea was it for Thor to watch Lion King?" he asked.

"Clint's," Steve answered taking the movie out of the player and grabbing another. "You want to watch something with me?"

Tony shook his head. "Nah. I'd love to but Pepper's insisting I go to this board meeting. What are you watching? Another one of Clint's suggestions?"

Steve held up a DVD case. "Yeah, he said it was about a Starship Enterprise or something."

Tony saw the case and gasped. Steve was holding 'The Phantom Menace.' "No, no, no, Steve, that's Star _Wars_ not Star _Trek_!"

Steve looked confused. "I thought they were the same thing?"

Resisting the urge to face palm, Tony snatched the case from Steve. "Uh-uh. They're completely different. I'll show you," he put the DVD back and searched for another one. "I'm going to have a serious talk with Clint….. Ah, here we are! We'll start with Star Wars."

"But that's the fourth one," Steve protested, "The first one is-"

"Ah, ah, ah," Tony said wagging a finger. "Four, Five and Six come first." He patted Steve on the arm. "That's just me being a good friend. JARVIS?" Tony called.

_Yes sir?_

"Cancel all my appointments. I have to educate our dear Captain America."

* * *

**(A/N:) *attempts Jedi mind-trick* _You will follow this story. You will favorite this story. You will leave a review about how awesome this story is. You will tell your friends about this hilarious story that you can't wait to read every Friday. You will- _ Aw, forget it. See (not literally) y'all next week!**


	14. Halloween Party

**(A/N:) It's Friday, and that means it's time for another misadventure! Enjoy :D **

* * *

It was Halloween and Tony had invited everyone to the tower for a costume party.

"Are you coming Tony?" Pepper called into the bedroom. "People are starting to get here."

"Yeah…" he called back, sounding distracted. "I'll be out in a minute."

"Kay," Pepper replied, adjusting her witch hat. "I'm heading down."

Pepper's black dress swished around her ankles as she made her way down to the party room that she had decked out earlier that day with your typical Halloween decorations. Cobwebs, Jock-O-Lanterns, skeletons, bats hanging from the ceiling, etc. She'd even gotten a smoke machine from Tony's lab and programmed JARVIS to make the lights flicker every now and then.

Steve and Bruce, who were getting punch, greeted her. Bruce was dressed as Frankenstein's monster, with tattered clothes and skin painted green. Cap was dressed as the classic Count Dracula.

"Good evening, ma'am," Steve said around fake fangs, swishing his cape dramatically.

Pepper laughed. "Hello Steve, Bruce. Do you know if Natasha and Clint are coming?"

"Natasha was trying to convince Fury to come," Bruce explained.

Pepper raised an eyebrow. "Think she can do it?"

The two Avengers shrugged and Steve said, "Guess we'll find out soon enough."

As if on cue, Natasha walked in, dressed as Cleopatra flanked by Maria Hill and Nick Fury, both dressed as pirates.

Steve and Bruce cheered seeing that Natasha had successfully managed to convince Fury to join them. Fury brushed the giant feather from his hat away from his face with the hook for a hand. "If word of this gets out to anyone," Fury threatened, pointing his hook at everyone and glaring with his one good eye. "I will hunt you down."

Everyone nodded, still thoroughly amused.

"Hey, where's Clint?" Bruce asked.

Natasha huffed and stomped back to the door. "You can't hide in there forever, Clint!" Natasha called.

Sam could be heard laughing from the other side of the door. He stumbled in the room dressed as a mummy. "You might as well get it over with, dude," he called.

"Don't make me come in there." Natasha threatened.

They heard Clint groan. "Okay, okay I'm coming…" Clint walked out, wearing a pink tunic, sandals, and angel wings. His grip tightened on the pink bow and heart shaped arrow in his hands as everyone burst out laughing.

"What…. Is that?" Bruce managed to say. "And why are you wearing it?"

"Lost a bet," Cling huffed.

"He's a Cupid," Natasha explained. "He didn't think I would be able to get Fury to come," she smirked. Clint just glared.

Coulson arrived shortly after, wearing his Captain America hoodie and carrying a shield he had made himself. The head agent even brought a few members of his team along too. Fitz and Simmons were dressed as Sherlock and Watson (Jemma had somehow convinced Leo to be Watson so she could be Sherlock) and Agent May was Mulan.

Other people started showing up and Thor and Jane were the last to arrive. Thor was wearing a Jedi robe with his hair braided Padawan style and carrying a light-saber instead of Mjolnir. Jane was dressed as Padme Amidala, and, as Pepper later stated, the resemblance was uncanny.

Music began to play and the party was in full swing, but Tony was still absent. "Where's Tony at?" Rhodey, who had zombiefied himself, asked Pepper.

She shrugged. "He said he'd be down in a minute."

"And here I am," Tony called.

Pepper and Rhodey turned around to see the billionaire walking up behind them, dressing in normal clothes.

"There you are," Pepper said, looking him up and down, frowning. "Tony, why aren't you wearing a costume?"

Tony grinned. "Oh ye of little faith, of course I'm in costume." He turned around and yelled, "Love the dress, Clint!"

"Well, who are you then?" Bruce challenged, walking up to them.

Tony spread his arms out. "Robert Downey Jr." he said matter-of- factly. "Isn't the green pain a little redundant, Bruce?"

* * *

**(A/N:) I apologize if this isn't 100% accurate because I don't do Halloween... Shout-out to my lil sis for the idea of Jane dressing up as Padme since they're both played by Natalie Portman and all. But I'm taking full credit for the Mulan/May/Ming-Na Wen ;3;  
**

**There may be more Agents of SHIELD appearances in future misadventures if y'all are interested.  
**

**Anyways, I'd love it if you'd be so kind as to leave a review! Until next week ^.^  
**


	15. Ice Bucket Challenge

"Why must I do this?" Thor asked as he sat down in the cold metallic chair. Instead of his godly regal armor, Thor was wearing normal pants and a t-shirt.

Bruce searched his phone for the video camera app. "Because Clint challenged you," he explained. "It's for charity."

"Oh, I see," Thor said, but he still looked confused.

"You ready, Tony?" Bruce called up to the sky, shading his eyes from the sun. Tony was flying above the thunderer, with a massive bucked, well barrel, of ice water. It was going to take large amount of the stuff to affect the god of thunder.

"Any day now!" Tony called. "This isn't getting any lighter."

Bruce aimed his phone at Thor and pressed the record button. "Alright, big guy, you're on."

"Greetings mortals!" Thor nearly shouted. "I am Thor Odinson and I have been nominated by my friend Clint Barton to participate in the Cold-Bucked-Of- Ice –Water-Dumped-On-Your-Head Challenge for Charity."

Bruce motioned with his finger for Thor to continue. "And….."

Thor thought a moment. "And….. what?"

"You get to challenge any three people you want. As long as they haven't already done it," Bruce said.

Thor smiled. "Wonderful! In that case, I challenge Heimdall, the Son of Coul, and the Man of Iron!"

"Oh come on!" Tony protested from the sky.

Bruce snickered. "Alright, countdown. Three… Two… One!"

Tony tipped the barrel, sending the mini waterfall down on Thor.

"BY ODIN'S TOENAILS, THAT IS FRIDGED!" Thor yelled leaping up when the torrent had ceased, jumping around in an attempt to warm himself.

Bruce leapt backward in order to keep the phone dry as Thor shook is long, blond locks like a dog. "Why don't you just come on down and get it over with, Tony?" Bruce shouted skyward.

"No way, José," Iron Man shouted.

"Come on Tony," Bruce persisted. "Don't be a party pooper."

"Fine." He huffed. "but you have to catch me first."

Bruce turned to Thor, eyebrows raised. "Thor?" he questioned. "You up for it?"

A gleeful grin broke out on Thor's face as he summoned his hammer. "Aye!"

"Oh dang." Tony turned and hightailed it in the opposite direction, trying to get the most out of the head start.

Thor swung his hammer around and around before shooting off after Iron Man, slinging droplets of ice water in his wake.


	16. It's Science

**(A/N) Wow, this week really snuck up on me! I just realized last night that I didn't have a misadventure to put up and had a brief moment of panic. XD Enjoy!**

* * *

Pepper checked her watch as she pressed a button to summon the elevator. Good, she wouldn't be late for the staff meeting. She straightened her skirt and made sure her hair was in place, then heard a strange noise coming down the hall getting louder and louder.

"What is Tony up to now?" she internally groaned.

She soon found out. For the moment Pepper had stepped into the hallway, Tony whizzed by, nearly knocking her off her feet. The billionaire was propped up on his knees in a swivel chair, using his Iron Man jet boots to propel himself down the hall. His hands gripped the back of the chair, using it to steer as he barely managed to avoid running into Pepper.

Before she could demand what Tony was doing, he called over his shoulder, "IT'S SCIENCE, PEPPER!"

Then along came Bruce running around the corner, wearing a lab coat and holding a clipboard and stopwatch in hand. He looked around, confused. "Ummm, have you seen….?"

A loud crash was heard a few rooms down followed by a high-pitched squeal. Pepper face-palmed.

"Uhhhh…." Cringing, Bruce side-stepped around Pepper. "Never mind." He rushed to where the ruckus came from and found Tony sprawled out on the ground, soaking wet from a fish tank he'd knocked off a shelf. Bruce picked his way around the books, glass figurines, and a vase of flowers that had also fallen to pick the swivel chair up and off of Tony.

"AAAACK!" Tony jumped up, his metal boots leaving holes in the floor as he wiggling around trying to reach into the back of his shirt. "Get it out! Get it out!"

A poor goldfish fell from Tony's shirt and onto the floor, gasping for breath. Bruce picked it up gently and returned it to what little water was left in the tank. "Science, huh?" he smirked.

Tony rolled his eyes. "Shut up."

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**(A/N) Review? :D **


	17. Exploding Turkeys

**A/N: OH MY STARS, 99 reviews!? Thanks everyone! Sorry this is late-ish. I've been sick and didn't feel like writing 'till this afternoon :P ****I'm not entirely pleased with how it turned out, but it was either this, or nothing...**  
**Anyways, I hope you enjoy this Thanksgiving/Turkey Day misadventure.  
**

* * *

"Uhhh, Tony?" Bruce asked, concerned laced in his voice. "You sure about this?"

"Nope." The billionaire said popping the 'p'. He grinned. "Let's do it."

Bruce bit his lip as he pulled on a pair of protective goggles. After pressing a few buttons on the tablet he was holding, Tony did the same and a robotic metal arm with a frozen turkey in its claw rolled up to them.

Tony muttered some science-y stuff under his breath and ordered the robot to hold the turkey over a metal, cylindrical container.

"Hey, Tony, have you seen-" Captain America's sentence trailed off at the sight before him. "What in the world are you doing?"

"What does it look like, Spangles?" Tony snorted. "Getting the turkey ready for Thanksgiving dinner."

"But… I'm supposed to get the turkey ready." Steve protested. "I already have one in the oven."

Tony pursed his lips. "Really? Well then, I guess we'll have two. Which may not be a bad thing. You know how much Thor eats."

Steve raised an eyebrow. "Thor's coming?"

"He is now. Now off you go," Tony shooed. "Go finished your plain, boring, everyday, turkey, whilst the Science Bros," he grabbed Bruce in an awkward side hug, "make the turkey of the future, using arc reactor technology!" he finished with a dramatic wave of his hand. Bruce rolled his eyes.

"Tony," Steve said, his voice holding that lecture tone. "Not everything in the world needs to be upgraded. New doesn't always mean improved. If it's not broken, don't-" Steve was cut off by the door abruptly shutting.

"Whoopsie," Tony said taking his finger of his tablet. "How clumsy of me. Oh well, now, where were we?"

* * *

People were casually walking the streets in New York, some bundling up against the cold, some hailing taxis, some making purchases and buying their own turkeys for dinner-

_KEEERBOOOMMM!_

Everyone yelped as an explosion rippled through the air. Heads swiveled to the noise's direction as a pillar of smoke slowly rose from Stark Tower.

* * *

Bruce and Tony stared at each other as the smoke cleared away, both of them covered head to toe in black soot except from where they were wearing the goggles. Their turkey had been completely incinerated.

"The turkey of the future, huh?" Steve coughed from the door that had been blow open. He chuckled as he headed back down to the kitchen.

"Ooooh, he is not getting away with this," Tony said, rummaging through a draw.

"Tony?" Bruce said, dodging stuff Tony threw behind him. "What are you planning?"

Tony turned around, a certain spark in his eye that Bruce knew meant trouble. "Revenge."

Bruce held his hands up and backed away. "Uh-huh. I'm not having any part in this…."

* * *

"Steve, the turkey smells wonderful," Natasha complimented as the Avengers all sat down to eat.

Steve smiled proudly. "Thank you." He looked right at Tony and Bruce, who both still had the slightest tinge of black about them. "You just can't beat old traditions. And wait until you taste the stuffing, it's my grandmother's special recipe."

"Come then, friend Steve," Thor said, drooling already. "Let us feast!"

Steve grabbed the knife and began to carve his masterpiece when-

_POW_!

Turkey and stuffing when flying as the bird exploded, splattering on the heroes, walls, ceiling, and floor.

"Well," Tony said matter-of-factly. "Two exploding turkeys in one day. What will I think of next?"

"TONY!" they all yelled, except for Thor. He was too preoccupied licking stuffing off Mjolnir.

* * *

**A/N: Mjolnir also doubles as a spoon...? :P **


	18. Shopping

**A/N: Enjoy!... or else... Uh... I'll think of something...**

**Anywho, Benedict Cumberbatch is officially Doctor Strange... I'm not sure how I feel about this. I mean, he's a great actor and all I just don't know if he's right for the part. But then again a lot of people thought Chris Hemsworth and Tom Hiddleston where horrible choices but they turned out to be starts. I guess time will tell.**

**Okay, I'm done rambling. **

* * *

People stopped in the middle of their grocery shopping and stared. Their shopping carts halted and their mouths were slightly agape. It was rude, but it wasn't every day you saw a god in the breakfast aisle.

But some superheroes have to do their own grocery shopping.

Thor steered his cart parallel to the shelves of Poptarts and stared at them thoughtfully.

"Um, excuse me…." An employee cautiously walked up. "Can I uhh…. Help you with anything?"

"That will not be necessary," Thor said, then abruptly took his hand and knocked a whole shelf worth of Poptarts into his cart. He turned and smiled brightly to the employee as he walked away. "Good day to you!"

With his cart nearly overflowing with boxes, Thor headed to the checkout area and began unloading. The poor cashier could barely keep up.

Bruce wheeled in behind the thunderer, his cart filled to the rim with button-up shirts just as Thor began arguing about the method of payment.

"Sir, we only take cash and major credit cards….."

"But gold is the main currency throughout all the realms, is it not?" Thor said, still trying to hand the cashier a gold coin.

Bruce came to the rescue. "I'll take care of it," he said handing the money to the relived cashier and pocketing Thor's gold.

The two Avengers wheeled their purchases away and Bruce sighed, staring at his shirts. "These won't even last me a week."

"Aye," Thor agreed, looking longingly at his Poptarts. "I can relate."

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**A/N: Yes, yes, yes, it is short, but I have had zero inspiration on this series for the last few weeks... *gets distracted by something shiny* **


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